Edited by Robert V. Rakestraw (December 18, 2016)
Have you ever really lived a day?
[John Wesley’s Journal, Dec. 23, 1744.] “I was unusually lifeless and heavy, till the love-feast in the evening; when, just as I was constraining myself to speak, I was stopped, whether I would or no; for the blood gushed out of both my nostrils, so that I could not add another word: But in a few minutes it stayed, and all our hearts and mouths were opened to praise God.
“Yet the next day I was again as a dead man; but in the evening, while I was reading Prayers at Snowsfields, I found such light and strength as I never remember to have had before. I saw every thought, as well as action or word, just as it was rising in my heart; and whether it was right before God, or tainted with pride or selfishness. I never knew before (I mean not as at this time) what it was ‘to be still before God.’
“Tues. 25. [Christmas Day]—I waked, by the grace of God, in the same spirit; and about eight, being with two or three that believed in Jesus, I felt such an awe and tender sense of the presence of God as greatly confirmed me therein: So that God was before me all the day long. I sought and found him in every place; and could truly say, when I lay down at night, ‘Now I have lived a day.’ ”
From An Extract of the Rev. Mr. John Wesley’s Journal, Vol. I, in The Works of John Wesley, Third Ed., Vol. I (Baker, 1979 reprint of 1872 ed. issued by Wesleyan Methodist Book Room, London), pp. 478-479. The above quotation may be found, along with other articles and essays, on Dr.Rakestraw’s website/blog, gracequestministries.org., where you may sign up to receive automatically postings such as this at no cost, and where you may order his books GraceQuest and Heart Cries. You may write to him at firstname.lastname@example.org.